The Atlantic unearthed a picture of Newt Gingrich and his third wife, Callista, posing arm in arm in front of Auschwitz. “Newt is wearing his default smirk,” the magazine observes, and says “there is something distinctly off about these tourist-style shots in front of the Nazi death-camp.”
It’s not actually that strange: exhaustive research reveals that the Gingrichs often pose—in the same outfits and with these same facial expressions, in fact!—at the sites of many of the world’s great tragedies:
I’m not sure if Eminem has yet managed to escape the grasp of the Illuminati—the secret society of string pullers whose ranks he joined years ago in exchange for wealth, fame, and power—but I know he’s been trying very hard.
Numerous people online tell me so. There is, for starters, a Yahoo Answers page that poses the question “Is Eminem trying to break free from the Illuminati?” and offers spirited excavation and analysis of the hidden anti-Illuminati messages Eminem embedded in his song “Not Afraid.” There is a four-page message-board thread titled “Is Eminem an Illuminati slave?”
A YouTube video called “Eminem vs. Illuminati” explains, via solemn text and creepy music, that when the Detroit M.C. titled a song “Cinderella Man,” it was not because the redemptive plot of the 2005 Ron Howard film Cinderella Man echoes Eminem’s own comeback from drug addiction, but rather because, like Cinderella with her wicked stepsisters, Eminem was “forced to do the chores for the Illuminati by sending subliminal messages through his music.”
Ignore any comment-section sheep who bah that this is ridiculous: When that video ends, the hunt for truth has only just begun.